I read this book in a day and a half- I found it enthralling at first and then a bit of a drag, precisely because he promises much right at the beginning and then as one begins to unravel his arguement about so called 'wisdom of crowds', you realize he's only packaging some pretty basic statistical tools of sampling and behavioral economics in a commonsensical manner. Not that it doesn't require skill to do that- it does and he has a great story telling technique but the book falls short of making you think differently, something that Gladwell does quite brilliantly in both The Tipping Point and Blink.
So what exactly is the thesis of the book. I am reproducing here a short summary from Publisher's Weekly thats pretty good.
"While our culture generally trusts experts and distrusts the wisdom of the masses, New Yorker business columnist Surowiecki argues that "under the right circumstances, groups are remarkably intelligent, and are often smarter than the smartest people in them." To support this almost counterintuitive proposition, Surowiecki explores problems involving cognition (we're all trying to identify a correct answer), coordination (we need to synchronize our individual activities with others) and cooperation (we have to act together despite our self-interest). His rubric, then, covers a range of problems, including driving in traffic, competing on TV game shows, maximizing stock market performance, voting for political candidates, navigating busy sidewalks, tracking SARS and designing Internet search engines like Google. If four basic conditions are met, a crowd's "collective intelligence" will produce better outcomes than a small group of experts, Surowiecki says, even if members of the crowd don't know all the facts or choose, individually, to act irrationally. "Wise crowds" need (1) diversity of opinion; (2) independence of members from one another; (3) decentralization; and (4) a good method for aggregating opinions. The diversity brings in different information; independence keeps people from being swayed by a single opinion leader; people's errors balance each other out; and including all opinions guarantees that the results are "smarter" than if a single expert had been in charge. Surowiecki's style is pleasantly informal, a tactical disguise for what might otherwise be rather dense material. He offers a great introduction to applied behavioral economics and game theory. "
If you actually analyze the four conditions he talks about, those are just good statistical techniques anyway. In that sense, the title of the book is a misnomer- its not just crowds that he is talking about, he is talking about a sample of people with diversity of opinion, complete independence and also having a good method of aggregating data. All these are simple reassertions of mathematical principles and applying them in social theory, albeit interesting, is not quite pathbreaking.
One thing is for sure- Surowiecki has a great gift for story telling and is able to explain complex social experiments in a very simple, understandable manner that makes these experiments so much more appealing and less esoteric. Just for that, if not anything else, this book is worth reading but don't expect a classic!
Sunday, August 28, 2005
Thursday, August 18, 2005
Is it necessary to work?
I have often fantasized about life without any work- no deadlines, no one to report to, no reports to write, nothing to do, just lazing around meeting friends and having a 'good time'. Guess what? I've had my wish and I am beginning to find myself 'over-vacationed'!!
I graduated from Harvard in June and my work doesn't begin till later this month. So I decided to go on a vacation. I visited India, Singapore, several places in the Philippines, met with old friends, relatives, well wishers, did some sight seeing, drank plenty of beer, ate some great food and then, came back to the US. Almost since the last week of my vacation, I have been itching to get back to work. I want to do something productive and not just read or travel or write a blog. There is a certain emptiness to the day that I need to fill up each day. I decide to go for a drive, sometimes, I read, sometimes I write, sometimes I just walk. But all of these are also beginning to be a bore. I clearly want to more productive. I really want to work! Did I think I would ever say that? No way.
Work clearly gives a greater meaning to our lives, or at least my life. It gives me a professional anchor, a place for intellectual stimulation and growth and a place where I feel I am making a difference and contributing something not just to myself but also to the larger good. Which is why we are all so upset when we don't quite enjoy our work. Work gives us a sense of worth and worthless work is not worth doing! And I am not being facetious here.
This is indeed a serious discovery for me. We enjoy our vacation only when we come off some hard work. In fact, the harder the grind, the happier the vacation, which is why we look forward to weekends as much due to all the work done in the past week as also in anticipation for the week ahead. Vacation is an energizer when it comes as a break from serious enterprise and ceases to be enjoyable when it goes on for too long. I do consider myself fortunate to enjoy such a vacation though- otherwise I would never have realized the need to work, at least in my own case and how important it is to complete my personality and sense of being.
I graduated from Harvard in June and my work doesn't begin till later this month. So I decided to go on a vacation. I visited India, Singapore, several places in the Philippines, met with old friends, relatives, well wishers, did some sight seeing, drank plenty of beer, ate some great food and then, came back to the US. Almost since the last week of my vacation, I have been itching to get back to work. I want to do something productive and not just read or travel or write a blog. There is a certain emptiness to the day that I need to fill up each day. I decide to go for a drive, sometimes, I read, sometimes I write, sometimes I just walk. But all of these are also beginning to be a bore. I clearly want to more productive. I really want to work! Did I think I would ever say that? No way.
Work clearly gives a greater meaning to our lives, or at least my life. It gives me a professional anchor, a place for intellectual stimulation and growth and a place where I feel I am making a difference and contributing something not just to myself but also to the larger good. Which is why we are all so upset when we don't quite enjoy our work. Work gives us a sense of worth and worthless work is not worth doing! And I am not being facetious here.
This is indeed a serious discovery for me. We enjoy our vacation only when we come off some hard work. In fact, the harder the grind, the happier the vacation, which is why we look forward to weekends as much due to all the work done in the past week as also in anticipation for the week ahead. Vacation is an energizer when it comes as a break from serious enterprise and ceases to be enjoyable when it goes on for too long. I do consider myself fortunate to enjoy such a vacation though- otherwise I would never have realized the need to work, at least in my own case and how important it is to complete my personality and sense of being.
Wednesday, August 17, 2005
The business of free advice
On my vacation, I realized that generally, people back home in India love giving advice. When they think you are faced with a dilemma, the advice comes thick and fast from all corners genuinely wanting to help you make a decision. Unfortunately, there are three aspects of this advice that make it not only slightly unhelpful, but even annoying at times.
One- the advice is almost always unsolicited.
Second- the advice is given on anything and everything whether the person giving the advice knows anything about the subject.
Third- the advice comes even after you have already taken action and theres nothing you can change.
A couple of incidents shall illustrate the point. My father was suffering from cataract of the eye and I wanted to get him operated on while I was in Jaipur. Now, we wanted to get a really good doctor who could do the operation. We did our research, asked around, narrowed the field to three, my dad and I met with the three doctors, we liked all but liked one in particular and went with the man- Dr. Ashok Puri. He also happened to be the most well renowned eye surgeon in Jaipur and we finalized everything. Within a couple of days, the operation was done and Dad was back at home, feeling wonderful with new eyes.
As people came in to see my dad, the advice started, first about the doctor and then about the recuperative procedure. About the doctor, we were told that he's way too expensive, he does not give enough time to patients and there are others who are better. When asked who these better ones were and who had got their operation done there, they would refer to some remote uncle of theirs who had got some eye operation(not even cataract) and was telling them he was good. I was amazed that this third party advice was being given so authoritatively. Secondly, the operation had already been done. There was no way to reverse it. Thirdly, my dad was feeling absolutely fine both with the doctor and his eye and so it didn't quite matter apart from just unsettling him a little bit about whether we had made the right decision in the first place. And then there was plenty of advice regarding how he should handle the eyes once the operation has been done. This was way above what the doctor had told us to do. I was grateful that people came to look up my dad but wasn't so grateful for the free advice that was being dished out.
Similarly, one of my cousins was seeking admission in a college in Delhi and she was again inundated with a plethora of advice- about colleges, about courses, about prospects of studying in Delhi versus Jaipur. As I looked at the people dishing out advice, I was amazed as few of them had either studied in Delhi or had background similar to the one my cousin had. But the conviction of their stand was to be seen to be believed.
These two incidents made me think. Why are we so keen to give advice plus what makes us so confident about giving it in the first place? Keenness could be attributed to a genuine desire to help. I am not sure about the conviction of advice. A false assertion could lead to a loss of credibility and so common sense demands that advice should be given sparingly and only on subjects that one is reasonably sure on. Apparently, that really doesn't matter. Much as I like the fact that people are out to help, it is also quite obvious to me that they eventually do more harm than good. So whats the best way out. Listen, be polite, but do what you think best, otherwise you could be paralyzed into inaction given all the advice you receive. This way, you will keep your relationships intact and also sleep well at night!
One- the advice is almost always unsolicited.
Second- the advice is given on anything and everything whether the person giving the advice knows anything about the subject.
Third- the advice comes even after you have already taken action and theres nothing you can change.
A couple of incidents shall illustrate the point. My father was suffering from cataract of the eye and I wanted to get him operated on while I was in Jaipur. Now, we wanted to get a really good doctor who could do the operation. We did our research, asked around, narrowed the field to three, my dad and I met with the three doctors, we liked all but liked one in particular and went with the man- Dr. Ashok Puri. He also happened to be the most well renowned eye surgeon in Jaipur and we finalized everything. Within a couple of days, the operation was done and Dad was back at home, feeling wonderful with new eyes.
As people came in to see my dad, the advice started, first about the doctor and then about the recuperative procedure. About the doctor, we were told that he's way too expensive, he does not give enough time to patients and there are others who are better. When asked who these better ones were and who had got their operation done there, they would refer to some remote uncle of theirs who had got some eye operation(not even cataract) and was telling them he was good. I was amazed that this third party advice was being given so authoritatively. Secondly, the operation had already been done. There was no way to reverse it. Thirdly, my dad was feeling absolutely fine both with the doctor and his eye and so it didn't quite matter apart from just unsettling him a little bit about whether we had made the right decision in the first place. And then there was plenty of advice regarding how he should handle the eyes once the operation has been done. This was way above what the doctor had told us to do. I was grateful that people came to look up my dad but wasn't so grateful for the free advice that was being dished out.
Similarly, one of my cousins was seeking admission in a college in Delhi and she was again inundated with a plethora of advice- about colleges, about courses, about prospects of studying in Delhi versus Jaipur. As I looked at the people dishing out advice, I was amazed as few of them had either studied in Delhi or had background similar to the one my cousin had. But the conviction of their stand was to be seen to be believed.
These two incidents made me think. Why are we so keen to give advice plus what makes us so confident about giving it in the first place? Keenness could be attributed to a genuine desire to help. I am not sure about the conviction of advice. A false assertion could lead to a loss of credibility and so common sense demands that advice should be given sparingly and only on subjects that one is reasonably sure on. Apparently, that really doesn't matter. Much as I like the fact that people are out to help, it is also quite obvious to me that they eventually do more harm than good. So whats the best way out. Listen, be polite, but do what you think best, otherwise you could be paralyzed into inaction given all the advice you receive. This way, you will keep your relationships intact and also sleep well at night!
Tuesday, August 16, 2005
What's in a name?
What's in a name? Apparently a lot, especially if you are in real estate. Certain names have distinct connotations that could either raise or lower the prestige of the property you are in.
I was in Gurgaon recently (a satellite town of Delhi which is mushrooming with outsourcing and industrial activity) and found that most residential complexes had English sounding names- Hamilton Court, Wellington Place etc. And then I across this property called JanPratinidhi Apartments- the name is distinctly from the Hindi heartland and means representative of the masses- probably a well thought out name for s residence that the common man can afford. The apartments looked good from the outside, well maintained and each apartment seemed to have a balcony which I thought was a great feature. As I enquired about the property, one of my real estate agent friends told me that it was not as popular a property as others and apparently, the name had a lot to do with it. Property has an aspirational quality to it- something you save for that you and your family can enjoy for the rest of your life. It is something you work towards and feel that you deserve. Apparently, this apartment got two things wrong with the name. One- it was in Hindi, a language of the masses, nothing aspirational about it. The same place, titled Somerset Palace would do much better, according to my friend, even if people didn't have a clue that Somerset is a county in England, it just needed to sound English. Second- even the Hindi name was one that associated with the masses in general. There was nothing distinctive about it. There was one way out of this, I suggested. Why don't they market it as JP Apartments? The acronym could stand for anything- it could be French sounding Jean Pierre for all I care as long it made the property attractive. And to my surprise, the agent did listen to my suggestion carefully and said it could just work. Properties in India become more attrative when they have foreign sounding names. Is it due to our colonial hangover? Is it due to the fact that we feel that properties that have foreign sounding names probably have developers that are more credible? I don't know.
But clearly, names do have significant impact and could almost make the properties not only more desirable but also more expensive. Isn't it fascinating that our perception clouds our judgment of reality and makes us behave in a manner that may not completely conform to our logical left brained thinking pattern? But then, doesn't this give color to our lives that would otherwise turn out to be fairly uninteresting.
I was in Gurgaon recently (a satellite town of Delhi which is mushrooming with outsourcing and industrial activity) and found that most residential complexes had English sounding names- Hamilton Court, Wellington Place etc. And then I across this property called JanPratinidhi Apartments- the name is distinctly from the Hindi heartland and means representative of the masses- probably a well thought out name for s residence that the common man can afford. The apartments looked good from the outside, well maintained and each apartment seemed to have a balcony which I thought was a great feature. As I enquired about the property, one of my real estate agent friends told me that it was not as popular a property as others and apparently, the name had a lot to do with it. Property has an aspirational quality to it- something you save for that you and your family can enjoy for the rest of your life. It is something you work towards and feel that you deserve. Apparently, this apartment got two things wrong with the name. One- it was in Hindi, a language of the masses, nothing aspirational about it. The same place, titled Somerset Palace would do much better, according to my friend, even if people didn't have a clue that Somerset is a county in England, it just needed to sound English. Second- even the Hindi name was one that associated with the masses in general. There was nothing distinctive about it. There was one way out of this, I suggested. Why don't they market it as JP Apartments? The acronym could stand for anything- it could be French sounding Jean Pierre for all I care as long it made the property attractive. And to my surprise, the agent did listen to my suggestion carefully and said it could just work. Properties in India become more attrative when they have foreign sounding names. Is it due to our colonial hangover? Is it due to the fact that we feel that properties that have foreign sounding names probably have developers that are more credible? I don't know.
But clearly, names do have significant impact and could almost make the properties not only more desirable but also more expensive. Isn't it fascinating that our perception clouds our judgment of reality and makes us behave in a manner that may not completely conform to our logical left brained thinking pattern? But then, doesn't this give color to our lives that would otherwise turn out to be fairly uninteresting.
Larks, owls and biorhythms
A long time back, I read some literature on biorhythms that pretty much said that there are two kinds of people in the world- the larks and the owls. The larks love waking up early in the morning, they are at their best between 7 and 11 in the morning, they like to get most of their work done by lunch, and its pretty much downhill from there. The owls, on the other hand, hate waking up early in the morning, they get into their rhythm only by late afternoon and are at their best after 2 in the afternoon. I promptly pronounced myself an owl- showed that article to my parents and asked them not to disturb my sleep early in the morning! They may be larks, but I'm an owl and getting up early for breakfast is not really working to my advantage- I reasoned. I would wake up a little later but would literally burn the midnight oil studying even as they hit the bed- I argued. My parents resisted initially but they came around to it and so I lived my life as an owl for all my student years.
It was all hunky dory till I started work. Workplaces arent made differently for larks and owls. There are certain times you have got to be there, irrespective of your pronounced biorhythm. There is no way out. The person I was reporting to in Singapore used to get up at 4 in the morning, 110% lark, would get into office by about 6:30, would have some breakfast meetings between 7 and 9, would finish most of his work by the lunch meeting and I would just be warming up to the day! I decided to work around this for a while but when it didn't quite work, I decided to give this lark lifestyle a try. Sleep early, get up early, be in office fresh and work my way through. It really was a refreshing change except that on some days, I would be done by 10am. I wouldnt know what to do with my time the rest of the day! The second problem would be that I would feel incredibly sleepy between 3 and 5 in office. It was this two hour window when it was excruciatingly difficult to concentrate on stuff and do some real work. But the more effective I became at work, I realized it was pointless staying in office if I didnt have any real work to do. So the timecycle changed a little as I worked. Would get up by 6:30, be in office by 7:30- 8, get all the major work done by about 1, continue with meetings and finish the day by about 5 to 6. As it turns out, this is actually a productive day and gives you time to get back home and spend time with family. As an owl, one would still be working till about 8 in office because you only started work around 9 anyway and didnt really get going till about 11.
I liked the discipline of the lark lifestyle and it just feels more healthy. Once in a while whenever I want to indulge, I switch back to the owl mode and found it incredibly relaxing.
So where does that leave the biorhythm debate? Are we one or the other? As with most other things, my view is that we are very flexible and can change according to time, place and circumstances. It just takes a little time to getting used to, but we do and can be larks or owls depending upon the needs of the situation. I just hope my parents don't read this, as for them, I'd love to remain an owl- tucked in bed during the holidays even as they go hustling onto their morning walks!
It was all hunky dory till I started work. Workplaces arent made differently for larks and owls. There are certain times you have got to be there, irrespective of your pronounced biorhythm. There is no way out. The person I was reporting to in Singapore used to get up at 4 in the morning, 110% lark, would get into office by about 6:30, would have some breakfast meetings between 7 and 9, would finish most of his work by the lunch meeting and I would just be warming up to the day! I decided to work around this for a while but when it didn't quite work, I decided to give this lark lifestyle a try. Sleep early, get up early, be in office fresh and work my way through. It really was a refreshing change except that on some days, I would be done by 10am. I wouldnt know what to do with my time the rest of the day! The second problem would be that I would feel incredibly sleepy between 3 and 5 in office. It was this two hour window when it was excruciatingly difficult to concentrate on stuff and do some real work. But the more effective I became at work, I realized it was pointless staying in office if I didnt have any real work to do. So the timecycle changed a little as I worked. Would get up by 6:30, be in office by 7:30- 8, get all the major work done by about 1, continue with meetings and finish the day by about 5 to 6. As it turns out, this is actually a productive day and gives you time to get back home and spend time with family. As an owl, one would still be working till about 8 in office because you only started work around 9 anyway and didnt really get going till about 11.
I liked the discipline of the lark lifestyle and it just feels more healthy. Once in a while whenever I want to indulge, I switch back to the owl mode and found it incredibly relaxing.
So where does that leave the biorhythm debate? Are we one or the other? As with most other things, my view is that we are very flexible and can change according to time, place and circumstances. It just takes a little time to getting used to, but we do and can be larks or owls depending upon the needs of the situation. I just hope my parents don't read this, as for them, I'd love to remain an owl- tucked in bed during the holidays even as they go hustling onto their morning walks!
Independence day musings!
India attained its independence from the British rule on the 15th of August, 1947. Its a day of celebration, but also reflection- a celebration of all our achievements- as the world's largest democracy, as a rapidly developing country with a huge educated workforce, as a potentially big market for tons of products and services, as a country that has a huge potential for being a veritable superpower in the years to come.
It is also a time of reflection- of why we haven't improved our infrastructure, why don't we have enough good roads and food and water and electricity for people, why one heavy rain can drown the commercial capital of the country, why we still have about 450 million people who are totally illiterate, why even the 'best minds' cannot take us faster on a road of development, why we cannot weed out corruption but take it almost as a part and parcel of public life, why despite all the urban expansion and so called rise of the middle class, aspects of fundamentalist religious thinking continue to bog us down as we hope to go forward in the 21st century.
These are tricky issues- some political, some social and some economic.
But there are some things that need to be urgently dealt with and they are essentially two-
a) Improve infrastructure: There is absolutely no excuse for roads to be so bad, electricity supply to be so inconsistent and water to be a constantly scare source in urban areas. We cannot hope for investment or development to take place if this doesnt happen, and soon.
2) Wider educational base: The educational system is still quite narrow- very few kids come under the purview of what can be termed acceptable education. Much more attentions needs to be given to education as opposed to our defence. Our malaise is illiteracy, not Pakistan or the dispute about Kashmir. Education is the only source of sustainable development and we need to commit to that.
I do like our democracy but it has come with certain costs- a potential tiger has been turned into a lumbering elephant and thats the pace of development we will take; China, as a result of market socialism, has moved much faster and with a more committed sense of purpose.
As we approach sixty years of freedom, I think we have leveraged on the British legacies- an english education, democratic institutions, formal justice systems- well enough within a larger framework to create a fairly robust nation, that survives despite all the chaos that seems to pervade it. I am not very jingoistic about either our past or our future prospects, but it does seem that the latter is more promising than the former has been and that is always a healthy sign!
It is also a time of reflection- of why we haven't improved our infrastructure, why don't we have enough good roads and food and water and electricity for people, why one heavy rain can drown the commercial capital of the country, why we still have about 450 million people who are totally illiterate, why even the 'best minds' cannot take us faster on a road of development, why we cannot weed out corruption but take it almost as a part and parcel of public life, why despite all the urban expansion and so called rise of the middle class, aspects of fundamentalist religious thinking continue to bog us down as we hope to go forward in the 21st century.
These are tricky issues- some political, some social and some economic.
But there are some things that need to be urgently dealt with and they are essentially two-
a) Improve infrastructure: There is absolutely no excuse for roads to be so bad, electricity supply to be so inconsistent and water to be a constantly scare source in urban areas. We cannot hope for investment or development to take place if this doesnt happen, and soon.
2) Wider educational base: The educational system is still quite narrow- very few kids come under the purview of what can be termed acceptable education. Much more attentions needs to be given to education as opposed to our defence. Our malaise is illiteracy, not Pakistan or the dispute about Kashmir. Education is the only source of sustainable development and we need to commit to that.
I do like our democracy but it has come with certain costs- a potential tiger has been turned into a lumbering elephant and thats the pace of development we will take; China, as a result of market socialism, has moved much faster and with a more committed sense of purpose.
As we approach sixty years of freedom, I think we have leveraged on the British legacies- an english education, democratic institutions, formal justice systems- well enough within a larger framework to create a fairly robust nation, that survives despite all the chaos that seems to pervade it. I am not very jingoistic about either our past or our future prospects, but it does seem that the latter is more promising than the former has been and that is always a healthy sign!
Thursday, August 11, 2005
Personal friendship and professional work
In 1995, one of the best friends offered me a job. I thanked him profusely, refused politely and went off to teach in a school, a far less glamorous job than my friend had offered me. I have never regretted the decision. We have remained very good friends. This time when I went to India, I did some consulting work for him. He again offered me something and once again, my answer was the same.
This got me thinking. We do want our boss to be our best friend but not our best friend to be our boss? Why is that so?
Why are we uncomfortable when our friends make us an offer to work for them? What is about it that makes us uncomfortable? Are we afraid that the realities of business are so stark that they shall inevitably call for decisions that would put a strain on our friendship? Or do we treasure our frienships so much that we do not want the mundane materialistic pennies and cents considerations get in the way somewhere to spoil the fun of a pristine friendship? Or is it possible that we do use our friends as wise counsel for everything from business dilemmas to family issues to personal crises to career decisions that we do want to have them continue to maintain their objectivity from a 'distance' rather than become a vested part of our own lives.
A very close friend of mine in Singapore is currently facing this dilemma. The business opportunity to work for his friend is great but he is hesitant. The reason- he values the friendship a heck of a lot. If the business doesnt succeed, he doesnt want to lose his best friend. Its a tricky situation to be in. On the one hand, one may argue that if they truly good friends, a failed business doesn't mean breakdown of friendships, in fact, it could just bring them closer as thats what adversity does to people who care about each other. On the other hand, there could some kind of 'blame' game, covert, subtle and difficult to express precisely because they are friends. Its easy to argue with a colleague over an issue, and still remain friends, but with good friends.......not too sure!!
Business that is too 'cold blooded' is boring, friendship that is too close and too chummy could not be good for business either- where exactly is the golden mean?? I dont know.
But clearly, this dilemma points to how much we tend to value our friendships and how we want to keep them and nurture them at all costs, at least for most of my close friends. Friends tend to play several roles- wise counsel, idea generators, reality checks and non judgemental gossip mongers! Most of all, they bring fun into our lives- and why would be want to give it all up if thats what a professional relationship would threaten to do!
This got me thinking. We do want our boss to be our best friend but not our best friend to be our boss? Why is that so?
Why are we uncomfortable when our friends make us an offer to work for them? What is about it that makes us uncomfortable? Are we afraid that the realities of business are so stark that they shall inevitably call for decisions that would put a strain on our friendship? Or do we treasure our frienships so much that we do not want the mundane materialistic pennies and cents considerations get in the way somewhere to spoil the fun of a pristine friendship? Or is it possible that we do use our friends as wise counsel for everything from business dilemmas to family issues to personal crises to career decisions that we do want to have them continue to maintain their objectivity from a 'distance' rather than become a vested part of our own lives.
A very close friend of mine in Singapore is currently facing this dilemma. The business opportunity to work for his friend is great but he is hesitant. The reason- he values the friendship a heck of a lot. If the business doesnt succeed, he doesnt want to lose his best friend. Its a tricky situation to be in. On the one hand, one may argue that if they truly good friends, a failed business doesn't mean breakdown of friendships, in fact, it could just bring them closer as thats what adversity does to people who care about each other. On the other hand, there could some kind of 'blame' game, covert, subtle and difficult to express precisely because they are friends. Its easy to argue with a colleague over an issue, and still remain friends, but with good friends.......not too sure!!
Business that is too 'cold blooded' is boring, friendship that is too close and too chummy could not be good for business either- where exactly is the golden mean?? I dont know.
But clearly, this dilemma points to how much we tend to value our friendships and how we want to keep them and nurture them at all costs, at least for most of my close friends. Friends tend to play several roles- wise counsel, idea generators, reality checks and non judgemental gossip mongers! Most of all, they bring fun into our lives- and why would be want to give it all up if thats what a professional relationship would threaten to do!
The joys of driving
One of the most therapeutic things I have discovered for myself is driving. And I learnt how to drive last December. I got my licence here in Boston, we bought an old Honda Accord and off we were, on our way. The moment I sat behind the wheel and hit the highways, I realized what I was really missing out on and what I'd suddenly discovered- I really love to drive.
And I drive without a reason, just into nowhere. I love the roads, the scenery, the setting and it is also time when I am able to think about myself- what I am doing and what I need to be doing as I go ahead. And sometimes, I don't really choose a destination. I hit the road and then decide what I need to do- I drive on the highway, whenever I do get tired, I get off the highway, have a diet coke and some fries and am back again.
Sometimes, I do land up in wonderful places. Like yesterday.
I got onto I-95 and instead of travelling south which I do a lot, I decided to go north. And I kept going as the weather was wonderful and the road not very busy. I got past Massachusets and entered new Hampshire and the scenery got even better and then, as I kept going, I realized I was getting past Portsmouth and entering Maine. I took the first exit and came back to Portsmouth as it just seemed so incredibly pretty. The city has an awesome location- it sits near the mouth of the Piscataqua River, a short, wide river that divides New Hampshire and Maine. The city also is at the hub of a metropolitan region that includes several small cities and many towns. The population is about 25,000 odd people and it is just one of the finest quaint towns I have come across on the East Coast. I sat on a restaurant on Bow Street overlooking the bridge that connects NH with Maine, had a margarita, a ceaser salad and realxed seeing the sun set on an incredible day. I did not take the I 95 South right away as I wanted to see a bit more of the coastline and I took some of the smaller roads I made my way back. It was just a most wonderful and relaxing drive.
I realize that these trips to nowhere can be very refreshing. You do end up in good places and since you have no expectations, there is always a surprise. Its a good way to be. And thank God I learnt how to drive. Things are just so much better. And I have begun to appreciate Pirsig's comment even more- "Sometimes, its better to travel than to arrive."
And I drive without a reason, just into nowhere. I love the roads, the scenery, the setting and it is also time when I am able to think about myself- what I am doing and what I need to be doing as I go ahead. And sometimes, I don't really choose a destination. I hit the road and then decide what I need to do- I drive on the highway, whenever I do get tired, I get off the highway, have a diet coke and some fries and am back again.
Sometimes, I do land up in wonderful places. Like yesterday.
I got onto I-95 and instead of travelling south which I do a lot, I decided to go north. And I kept going as the weather was wonderful and the road not very busy. I got past Massachusets and entered new Hampshire and the scenery got even better and then, as I kept going, I realized I was getting past Portsmouth and entering Maine. I took the first exit and came back to Portsmouth as it just seemed so incredibly pretty. The city has an awesome location- it sits near the mouth of the Piscataqua River, a short, wide river that divides New Hampshire and Maine. The city also is at the hub of a metropolitan region that includes several small cities and many towns. The population is about 25,000 odd people and it is just one of the finest quaint towns I have come across on the East Coast. I sat on a restaurant on Bow Street overlooking the bridge that connects NH with Maine, had a margarita, a ceaser salad and realxed seeing the sun set on an incredible day. I did not take the I 95 South right away as I wanted to see a bit more of the coastline and I took some of the smaller roads I made my way back. It was just a most wonderful and relaxing drive.
I realize that these trips to nowhere can be very refreshing. You do end up in good places and since you have no expectations, there is always a surprise. Its a good way to be. And thank God I learnt how to drive. Things are just so much better. And I have begun to appreciate Pirsig's comment even more- "Sometimes, its better to travel than to arrive."
Wednesday, August 10, 2005
Covey and personal effectiveness
I have always been interested in literature around personal effectiveness. Not just effectiveness at work. Effectiveness in everything- at work, play, leisure and generally, in life itself. Most of the literature that I came across appeared shallow to me- it was either very superficial and anything I tried out would work for some time and then, wither away.
So when I read a chapter from Covey as a part of my MBA course in 1998, I took some of his 'preachings' with a pinch of salt. Then, on a plane ride to Singapore, I read the book cover to cover. That was 2000. I have read the book several times since, and have completely enthralled by the power of his ideas. They are simple without being simplistic and that is what attracts me to them. At the same time, they have made me think more deeply about what I really want to be with my time, where I want to spend it, where I want to invest it and what I should actually refrain from doing. From simple time management tools to an actual assessment of my own values set, his Seven Habits have unquestionably made me a better, more effective person. And come to think of it, I do not think I practice all his habits to the extent I would like to. Very often, I slip and castigate myself for it.
I am reading it once more before I begin my professional work as I am sure I will again find some nuggets of wisdom that shall influence the way I approach both my work and my life.
If there is one book you may want to read and truly practice what is written there, let it be Covey's Seven Habits. You will not be disappointed!
So when I read a chapter from Covey as a part of my MBA course in 1998, I took some of his 'preachings' with a pinch of salt. Then, on a plane ride to Singapore, I read the book cover to cover. That was 2000. I have read the book several times since, and have completely enthralled by the power of his ideas. They are simple without being simplistic and that is what attracts me to them. At the same time, they have made me think more deeply about what I really want to be with my time, where I want to spend it, where I want to invest it and what I should actually refrain from doing. From simple time management tools to an actual assessment of my own values set, his Seven Habits have unquestionably made me a better, more effective person. And come to think of it, I do not think I practice all his habits to the extent I would like to. Very often, I slip and castigate myself for it.
I am reading it once more before I begin my professional work as I am sure I will again find some nuggets of wisdom that shall influence the way I approach both my work and my life.
If there is one book you may want to read and truly practice what is written there, let it be Covey's Seven Habits. You will not be disappointed!
Tuesday, August 09, 2005
The 'where are you from' conundrum
My wife and I are fond of saying that we are vagabonds- we would go wherever the opportunities will take us. And the more we move countries, the more difficult it is to answer the very simple question- Mohit- where are you from?
I have tried to think about this hard. I was born in Faridabad, a bustling industrial town in Haryana that could be called the Gurgaon of the seventies, but before I was one, we moved to Bombay. I lived there till I was 4, then we moved to Lucknow. This is where I had my schooling and my most formative years were spent there. At 17, I moved for College to Delhi and stayed there till I was 24, moved to Dehradun to teach at Doon School for a couple of years, after which I did an MBA in Manila, Philippines. After my MBA, I briefly worked in India and the Philippines before being hired as a Consultant based in Singapore where I spent five years. My last two years of consulting were literally spent in Malaysia, taking the Monday morning flight to Kuala Lumpur from Singapore and taking the Friday night flight back. Last year, we moved to Boston and have lived here since. I have an Indian citizenship, Permanent Resident-ship in Singapore, my wife is Filipino and my parents now reside not in Lucknow where I grew up but in Jaipur where they grew up.
So where exactly am I from? The closest answer would be Lucknow. I spent 12-13 years there, the schooling was excellent, the atmosphere was very multi-cultural (Lucknow has a sizeable Muslim population) and the values of hard work, respect for elders and the care for the family were instilled in me there. But again, Delhi is where I grew in terms of perspective and outlook. Doon is where I had my first real job and Singapore is where I learnt the ropes of consulting and the corporate world. When I land in Delhi, I feel just as much at home as I do when I land in Singapore. In fact, Lucknow is where I may be most distant from as I do not have many friends there anymore. Friends from Lucknow have moved all over, from Johannesburg to Hong Kong to London! I participate as vigorously in the debate about Singapore's competitiveness as I do when talking about the liberalization in Delhi or the political quagmire in the Philippines. I feel passionate about all these subjects as I have had close links with all these places and they all have been home to me at some point in time.
As I write this, I wonder whether I do need to answer this question at all. In this day and age, it may be a trifle obsolete. All I know is this- there needs to be a constancy of purpose and a strong character with well ingrained values- as long as we have that, irrespective of wherever we go, that place will become our home. So one could cheer for Manny or Johnny as loudly as one does for Sachin or Sehwag- so what if the fans of baseball dont understand cricket or vice versa, I know I could be a potential 'bridge' and that makes me feel pretty good.
I have tried to think about this hard. I was born in Faridabad, a bustling industrial town in Haryana that could be called the Gurgaon of the seventies, but before I was one, we moved to Bombay. I lived there till I was 4, then we moved to Lucknow. This is where I had my schooling and my most formative years were spent there. At 17, I moved for College to Delhi and stayed there till I was 24, moved to Dehradun to teach at Doon School for a couple of years, after which I did an MBA in Manila, Philippines. After my MBA, I briefly worked in India and the Philippines before being hired as a Consultant based in Singapore where I spent five years. My last two years of consulting were literally spent in Malaysia, taking the Monday morning flight to Kuala Lumpur from Singapore and taking the Friday night flight back. Last year, we moved to Boston and have lived here since. I have an Indian citizenship, Permanent Resident-ship in Singapore, my wife is Filipino and my parents now reside not in Lucknow where I grew up but in Jaipur where they grew up.
So where exactly am I from? The closest answer would be Lucknow. I spent 12-13 years there, the schooling was excellent, the atmosphere was very multi-cultural (Lucknow has a sizeable Muslim population) and the values of hard work, respect for elders and the care for the family were instilled in me there. But again, Delhi is where I grew in terms of perspective and outlook. Doon is where I had my first real job and Singapore is where I learnt the ropes of consulting and the corporate world. When I land in Delhi, I feel just as much at home as I do when I land in Singapore. In fact, Lucknow is where I may be most distant from as I do not have many friends there anymore. Friends from Lucknow have moved all over, from Johannesburg to Hong Kong to London! I participate as vigorously in the debate about Singapore's competitiveness as I do when talking about the liberalization in Delhi or the political quagmire in the Philippines. I feel passionate about all these subjects as I have had close links with all these places and they all have been home to me at some point in time.
As I write this, I wonder whether I do need to answer this question at all. In this day and age, it may be a trifle obsolete. All I know is this- there needs to be a constancy of purpose and a strong character with well ingrained values- as long as we have that, irrespective of wherever we go, that place will become our home. So one could cheer for Manny or Johnny as loudly as one does for Sachin or Sehwag- so what if the fans of baseball dont understand cricket or vice versa, I know I could be a potential 'bridge' and that makes me feel pretty good.
Unwell and alone!
One of the saddest things is when you are not well and alone! Nobody to ask how you are doing, nobody to ask what you would like to eat, nobody to put on the music you like- it really is no fun.
As I came back to Boston, my wife has had to take off to Texas on work, and I came down with some kind of a cold. Now, a cold is really bugging. Its not serious enough for you to be in bed, but you're still not fine. The head feels heavy, the nose runs incessantly and you don't even feel like reading. I also became slightly irritable, just at myself wondering why this was happening and whether this was psychosomatic (which, by the way I think it is). Last night, as I was struggling to get back to shape, I decided to do things that make me feel comfortable and back at home. That meant cooking (nicely done black daal), writing the blog, having plenty of fruits and water, and topping off the night by watching Jay Leno and reading a bit of Covey.
As luck would have it, the moment I woke up today, I felt so much better. The plan for the day would be to continue to eat fruits, plenty of salads, have the daal I cooked last night, read Covey, close in on the apartment rental, follow the India- Sri Lanka final where the Lankans have put up a very good score for us to chase, drive a little bit just to get some fresh air and again, have water all day long. Isn't this such a comfortable plan? I hope to have beaten my cold by the end of the day and look forward to my wife coming back from Texas this Friday!
As I came back to Boston, my wife has had to take off to Texas on work, and I came down with some kind of a cold. Now, a cold is really bugging. Its not serious enough for you to be in bed, but you're still not fine. The head feels heavy, the nose runs incessantly and you don't even feel like reading. I also became slightly irritable, just at myself wondering why this was happening and whether this was psychosomatic (which, by the way I think it is). Last night, as I was struggling to get back to shape, I decided to do things that make me feel comfortable and back at home. That meant cooking (nicely done black daal), writing the blog, having plenty of fruits and water, and topping off the night by watching Jay Leno and reading a bit of Covey.
As luck would have it, the moment I woke up today, I felt so much better. The plan for the day would be to continue to eat fruits, plenty of salads, have the daal I cooked last night, read Covey, close in on the apartment rental, follow the India- Sri Lanka final where the Lankans have put up a very good score for us to chase, drive a little bit just to get some fresh air and again, have water all day long. Isn't this such a comfortable plan? I hope to have beaten my cold by the end of the day and look forward to my wife coming back from Texas this Friday!
Monday, August 08, 2005
Living in a developed vs. developing country
As I travelled in India and the Philippines recently, I was constantly asked how it was like living in the US. I had to be careful about my answer as I have lived in US for about a year and that too as a student- at the same time, my experience is only living in Boston and that is so very different from many other places in the US. But, of course, I had to give an answer. Despite my caveats, people need an answer. You cannot dodge a question, especially in India. If you try to, people just ask it again, and then again, till you give them a semblance of an answer.
This made me think- right from the personal things that I need to take care of when I live here. I pretty much do everything on my own- I cook my own food, wash dishes, do the laundry, clear the trash- one is pretty much self sufficient. There are things to help you, like a dishwasher, but you are very much on your own unlike in India or the Philippines where there is splendid domestic help available to take care of such 'creature' comforts. Then, I explained to people how in Boston, you've got to pretty much shovel snow for about 5-10 minutes each day before taking out your car. Again, nobody does it for you, you do it yourself. You don't do it, your car doesn't get out. Things are a little different back home. In India, there is a person who comes everyday just to clean my brother's car. No such thing here. Go to a car wash and things will be done automatically. So, is automation a key differntiator between a developed and a developing country in terms of just the kind of life leads.
Or is it something more?
As I went about doing my own stuff in Delhi, I realized that self sufficiency is not really considered a good trait in terms of 'making it'. The more people you have around you to 'take care' of you, the better off you are! This clearly flies in the face of Gandhian logic but how much Gandhian living is being practised anyway. Now- let me be clear about this lest I be labelled a prude. Its not as if I don't like myself being pampered- somebody to clean the house, somebody to clean the car, somebody to wash dishes- its all good, comfortable living and I would love to have it, but its absence is fine with me too- as long as we have a requisite support and tools to work things through. Isn't that what flexibility and adaptibility is all about?!! Plus - you discover aspects of your personality that were completely hidden or lying dormant. For example, when I moved to Singapore from the Philippines (and domestic help is an issue in Singapore, it being a 'developed' country), I learnt to do many things on my own and one thing I particularly started enjoying was cooking. It is an incredibly therapeutic activity for me and though I am not the finest cook in the world, I do enjoy both the process of cooking as well as inviting people over to eat good vegetarian Indian meals!
Moving from the personal front to the more professional front, it does look like the US provides more opportunities for advancement especially for the well qualified people. It means greater responsibility, the ability to make a difference, the ability to craft your own role, and have a broader say in things in general. Does that excite me? Absolutely! Are such opportunities there in India? For sure, there are but the competition is more stiff as the number of positions are few and the number of people wanting those jobs humungous!
All in all, it really is a matter of perspective. I have loved every moment of living in Boston- my Harvard classmates, the Charles River, the Red Sox mania, the drives out of the city, the wonderful seasons and if all that means doing my own laundry and shoveling some snow in winter, its really a small price to pay!
This made me think- right from the personal things that I need to take care of when I live here. I pretty much do everything on my own- I cook my own food, wash dishes, do the laundry, clear the trash- one is pretty much self sufficient. There are things to help you, like a dishwasher, but you are very much on your own unlike in India or the Philippines where there is splendid domestic help available to take care of such 'creature' comforts. Then, I explained to people how in Boston, you've got to pretty much shovel snow for about 5-10 minutes each day before taking out your car. Again, nobody does it for you, you do it yourself. You don't do it, your car doesn't get out. Things are a little different back home. In India, there is a person who comes everyday just to clean my brother's car. No such thing here. Go to a car wash and things will be done automatically. So, is automation a key differntiator between a developed and a developing country in terms of just the kind of life leads.
Or is it something more?
As I went about doing my own stuff in Delhi, I realized that self sufficiency is not really considered a good trait in terms of 'making it'. The more people you have around you to 'take care' of you, the better off you are! This clearly flies in the face of Gandhian logic but how much Gandhian living is being practised anyway. Now- let me be clear about this lest I be labelled a prude. Its not as if I don't like myself being pampered- somebody to clean the house, somebody to clean the car, somebody to wash dishes- its all good, comfortable living and I would love to have it, but its absence is fine with me too- as long as we have a requisite support and tools to work things through. Isn't that what flexibility and adaptibility is all about?!! Plus - you discover aspects of your personality that were completely hidden or lying dormant. For example, when I moved to Singapore from the Philippines (and domestic help is an issue in Singapore, it being a 'developed' country), I learnt to do many things on my own and one thing I particularly started enjoying was cooking. It is an incredibly therapeutic activity for me and though I am not the finest cook in the world, I do enjoy both the process of cooking as well as inviting people over to eat good vegetarian Indian meals!
Moving from the personal front to the more professional front, it does look like the US provides more opportunities for advancement especially for the well qualified people. It means greater responsibility, the ability to make a difference, the ability to craft your own role, and have a broader say in things in general. Does that excite me? Absolutely! Are such opportunities there in India? For sure, there are but the competition is more stiff as the number of positions are few and the number of people wanting those jobs humungous!
All in all, it really is a matter of perspective. I have loved every moment of living in Boston- my Harvard classmates, the Charles River, the Red Sox mania, the drives out of the city, the wonderful seasons and if all that means doing my own laundry and shoveling some snow in winter, its really a small price to pay!
Sunday, August 07, 2005
The Guess Who Am I Contest
When I was in India, I dreaded picking up the phone at my parents' place. Why? Simply because the people calling up my parents' home, typically relatives, would never quite identify themselves, ask about my dad, my mom, their whereabouts and then promptly put the phone down. They would not even ask me who they would be talking to. I was amazed that seldom did feel the need to identify themselves when they would talk on phone.
But worse was to come. When I did come around to asking who I was talking to, there would be complete surprise, even anger at me not being able to identify the voice of the person I was talking to. It really was too much for me to play the "Guess Who Am I" Contest. A few times I did try to play the game, my mind would race dramatically at the various options that the voice seemed to point to and then, I would actually forget the content of the call! It ceased to be exciting beyond a point. So I decided it was best to leave picking up the phone to my parents, and not to me. Sometimes, they themselves would not be able to figure who they were talking to but they seemed quite nonchalant about it, almost as if they had grown used to it.
I guess this game is built on the twin premise that ones voice is distinctive and the same time, there is an inbuilt voice recognition system in receiver's head. My mind is more used to the plain and simple name identification system that just makes things so much simpler. And of course, no embarrassment at one's voice not being instantly recognized!
But worse was to come. When I did come around to asking who I was talking to, there would be complete surprise, even anger at me not being able to identify the voice of the person I was talking to. It really was too much for me to play the "Guess Who Am I" Contest. A few times I did try to play the game, my mind would race dramatically at the various options that the voice seemed to point to and then, I would actually forget the content of the call! It ceased to be exciting beyond a point. So I decided it was best to leave picking up the phone to my parents, and not to me. Sometimes, they themselves would not be able to figure who they were talking to but they seemed quite nonchalant about it, almost as if they had grown used to it.
I guess this game is built on the twin premise that ones voice is distinctive and the same time, there is an inbuilt voice recognition system in receiver's head. My mind is more used to the plain and simple name identification system that just makes things so much simpler. And of course, no embarrassment at one's voice not being instantly recognized!
Friday, August 05, 2005
Wake up call for Mumbai
A couple of weeks back, Mumbai was lashed with torrential rain and the city was paralyzed- thousands were rendered homeless, hundreds died and the commercial capital of India literally became a part of the sea cruelly exposing the infrastructural mess that Mumbai has become over the years.
But most people from Mumbai refuse to acknowledge theres something wrong with the city. They say trains are back, offices are open, water has receded and everythings back to normal. I wont be surprised if nothing is done about drainage in the city. Relief work will be done on an ad-hoc basis, and people will quickly forget about the flood. They will hail the spirit of the Mumbai-wallah and again proclaim it is the finest city to live in. Therein lies the problem- people are very defensive about the city they refuse to acknowledge its very weaknesses if that continues to be the case, we shall never be able to build a world class city out of Mumbai- forget world class, if Mumbai's infrastructure can match that of Kuala Lumpur or even Jakarta or Manila in the next 10 years, I will be happy. All these three cities get plenty of rain throughout the year and they are not really in the realms of the most developed cities in the world, but having lived in those cities for some time, they are far more comfortable cities to live and work in than Mumbai.
I am reproducing here an extract from a column in rediff by Shishir Bhate very appropriately titled- Mumbai- Stop Praising Yourself. Read on - it makes a lot of sense:
"So what is Mumbai's problem? It is this city's stoic acceptance of substandard things: substandard infrastructure, substandard politicians, substandard everything.
Mumbai suburbs need to break off
And what better way for politicians to get away without tackling the city's most significant problems than to pat the calamity-stricken Mumbaikar on his back and pronounce: 'Hail Mumbai and the spirit of the city's people. Even in the face of catastrophe, the city gets on its feet in a jiffy, dusts off its pants and gets going.'
True, the irrepressible spirit of the city's populace cannot be admired or praised enough. The Mumbaikar's resilience is phenomenal, but how about something more than a pat on the back and a lofty speech?
How about addressing the city's grievances? How about according people a decent, comfortable commute to and fro their work places? How about restraining the construction lobby's rapacious intentions? How about letting the city's natural defences be?
Help Mumbai!
Good infrastructure and superior town planning are vital for the safety of the citizens, stronger economic growth, higher productivity and competitiveness, and better standard of living. It's time we stopped praising our resilience at accepting the unacceptable. It's time we resolutely concentrated our energies in getting our due for the taxes we pay, in demanding a better life. Time to make it the jewel in the nation's crown in every sense of the word.
Till then, nothing will be normal."
But most people from Mumbai refuse to acknowledge theres something wrong with the city. They say trains are back, offices are open, water has receded and everythings back to normal. I wont be surprised if nothing is done about drainage in the city. Relief work will be done on an ad-hoc basis, and people will quickly forget about the flood. They will hail the spirit of the Mumbai-wallah and again proclaim it is the finest city to live in. Therein lies the problem- people are very defensive about the city they refuse to acknowledge its very weaknesses if that continues to be the case, we shall never be able to build a world class city out of Mumbai- forget world class, if Mumbai's infrastructure can match that of Kuala Lumpur or even Jakarta or Manila in the next 10 years, I will be happy. All these three cities get plenty of rain throughout the year and they are not really in the realms of the most developed cities in the world, but having lived in those cities for some time, they are far more comfortable cities to live and work in than Mumbai.
I am reproducing here an extract from a column in rediff by Shishir Bhate very appropriately titled- Mumbai- Stop Praising Yourself. Read on - it makes a lot of sense:
"So what is Mumbai's problem? It is this city's stoic acceptance of substandard things: substandard infrastructure, substandard politicians, substandard everything.
Mumbai suburbs need to break off
And what better way for politicians to get away without tackling the city's most significant problems than to pat the calamity-stricken Mumbaikar on his back and pronounce: 'Hail Mumbai and the spirit of the city's people. Even in the face of catastrophe, the city gets on its feet in a jiffy, dusts off its pants and gets going.'
True, the irrepressible spirit of the city's populace cannot be admired or praised enough. The Mumbaikar's resilience is phenomenal, but how about something more than a pat on the back and a lofty speech?
How about addressing the city's grievances? How about according people a decent, comfortable commute to and fro their work places? How about restraining the construction lobby's rapacious intentions? How about letting the city's natural defences be?
Help Mumbai!
Good infrastructure and superior town planning are vital for the safety of the citizens, stronger economic growth, higher productivity and competitiveness, and better standard of living. It's time we stopped praising our resilience at accepting the unacceptable. It's time we resolutely concentrated our energies in getting our due for the taxes we pay, in demanding a better life. Time to make it the jewel in the nation's crown in every sense of the word.
Till then, nothing will be normal."
Small vs. big town
I visited my wife's "small town" this time on my vacation. It is called Midsayap, and is in Mindanao, an island south of the Philippines, more famous for its Muslim separatist movement than for its rich agricultural produce, mainly coconuts and mangoes. My wife and her family were worried that I would get bored there. I was given DVDs to watch, some books to read lest I have nothing to do there. My wife's family was also very worried what I would eat there as everybody's carnivorous and I am largely vegetarian!
Imagine my huge surprise when somebody cooked an Indian meal for me there. Granted it wasnt the best Indian food I have had in my life, but the fact somebody even tried to make chapatis was enough for me. It was a wonderful experience- everybody was out to make me feel at home. The moment they I learnt I loved beer, out came bottles of San Miguel and the Vice Governor even threw an impromptu party for me at the Midsayap Tennis Club of which my father in law is a proud member. We had conversation around the Indians who have played tennis at the international stage from Amritraj and Sania Mirza. I was amazed they knew so many of Indian tennis players but clearly they read their papers and out ot make me feel at home!
There is something about the warmth of the hospitality of a small town that big cities just cant match. The people are simpler, they are somehow more affectionate and they also do everything they can to make you feel more comfortable- as a result, you tend to overlook some minor material comforts that you may enjoy in a bigger city. Secondly, there is something about the work ethic of the small town that I am very proud of and so is my wife. Our only passport to professional success is education and so we study very hard- we work the nights to ensure that at least in terms of education, we are well qualified to match the very best- what we could not get in terms of exposure that is available in a big city, we tend to make up in terms of academic excellence! It breeds a work ethic of both hard work and excellence, something I am not sure you would develop if you got everything in a platter in a big city.
On the flip side, though, the concept of privacy is completely missing in a small town. Everybody wants to have some say in what you are doing, who you are dating and who would eventually end up with. It could possibly be constricting as the worldview is limited. So the best option would be study in a small city, develop a good work ethic and then, move to the "big city" environment where opportunities are more and you can leverage what you have learnt.
At the end of the day, I constantly bemoan the end of innocence, and in my view, in a small town, that happens much later in life if at all, than in a big city. The warmth of the people, people I had never met in my life, in a small remote town in the southernmost island of the Philippines, their small gestures to make me comfortable, their attempts to make conversation with me in their broken English, their utmost joy in getting photographs clicked with me- all of these shall remain one of my most abiding memories of this vacation.
Maybe the "small town" work ethic and values combined with the "big city" outlook is all we need to lead a fulfilling life.
Imagine my huge surprise when somebody cooked an Indian meal for me there. Granted it wasnt the best Indian food I have had in my life, but the fact somebody even tried to make chapatis was enough for me. It was a wonderful experience- everybody was out to make me feel at home. The moment they I learnt I loved beer, out came bottles of San Miguel and the Vice Governor even threw an impromptu party for me at the Midsayap Tennis Club of which my father in law is a proud member. We had conversation around the Indians who have played tennis at the international stage from Amritraj and Sania Mirza. I was amazed they knew so many of Indian tennis players but clearly they read their papers and out ot make me feel at home!
There is something about the warmth of the hospitality of a small town that big cities just cant match. The people are simpler, they are somehow more affectionate and they also do everything they can to make you feel more comfortable- as a result, you tend to overlook some minor material comforts that you may enjoy in a bigger city. Secondly, there is something about the work ethic of the small town that I am very proud of and so is my wife. Our only passport to professional success is education and so we study very hard- we work the nights to ensure that at least in terms of education, we are well qualified to match the very best- what we could not get in terms of exposure that is available in a big city, we tend to make up in terms of academic excellence! It breeds a work ethic of both hard work and excellence, something I am not sure you would develop if you got everything in a platter in a big city.
On the flip side, though, the concept of privacy is completely missing in a small town. Everybody wants to have some say in what you are doing, who you are dating and who would eventually end up with. It could possibly be constricting as the worldview is limited. So the best option would be study in a small city, develop a good work ethic and then, move to the "big city" environment where opportunities are more and you can leverage what you have learnt.
At the end of the day, I constantly bemoan the end of innocence, and in my view, in a small town, that happens much later in life if at all, than in a big city. The warmth of the people, people I had never met in my life, in a small remote town in the southernmost island of the Philippines, their small gestures to make me comfortable, their attempts to make conversation with me in their broken English, their utmost joy in getting photographs clicked with me- all of these shall remain one of my most abiding memories of this vacation.
Maybe the "small town" work ethic and values combined with the "big city" outlook is all we need to lead a fulfilling life.
Back in Boston
I'm back!
And I'm so glad I'm back here. I left the US on the 20th of June and to tell you the truth- in the past two weeks, I really felt 'over-vacationed' if there is a word like that.
Where all did I go?
Singapore, India and the Philippines.
What exactly did I do?
Meet old friends, watch plenty of movies, do some consulting work (believe it or not!), and spend plenty of time with family!
What did I miss?
My wife, watching Jay Leno every night and broadband internet connection at my disposal.
And of course, writing the blog!
What did I like most?
Catching up with family, visiting my wife's ancestral home, eating plenty of great Indian food and watching cricket.
What is my plan for the next week?
Update the blog with my experiences, look for a new place for us in Boston and do plenty of driving- I really missed that.
And I'm so glad I'm back here. I left the US on the 20th of June and to tell you the truth- in the past two weeks, I really felt 'over-vacationed' if there is a word like that.
Where all did I go?
Singapore, India and the Philippines.
What exactly did I do?
Meet old friends, watch plenty of movies, do some consulting work (believe it or not!), and spend plenty of time with family!
What did I miss?
My wife, watching Jay Leno every night and broadband internet connection at my disposal.
And of course, writing the blog!
What did I like most?
Catching up with family, visiting my wife's ancestral home, eating plenty of great Indian food and watching cricket.
What is my plan for the next week?
Update the blog with my experiences, look for a new place for us in Boston and do plenty of driving- I really missed that.
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